There may come a point in time when our heart grows tired of waiting for something we know isn’t going to come and there is nothing more for us to give… It’s a struggle figuring out when to leave a relationship.
When is enough, enough and when do you finally decide a relationship is no longer worth any more of your time? No more heartache, no more stress and worry; no more tears at the bottom of your wine glass (o.k., maybe not for the guys). But seriously, how do we know when to leave a relationship?
How do you know when that last dig has dug a hole so far into your heart, you’re ready to walk out the door (or send them packin’)?
Unfortunately, I can’t answer that question for you. The truth of the matter is, that breaking point is going to be as different as our taste in men.
I can sit here and preach to you until I am blue in the face about what my tolerance level is; that doesn’t mean you will have the same threshold. I can, however, help put a few things in perspective in order for you to come to your own conclusion and make your own decision. After all, this is totally your decision to make…
Do They Admit Something is Wrong?
The first step to change is admitting that a change has to be made. Have you constantly made it apparent that something is bugging you; do they really listen and breath in everything that is hurting you? Or do they brush it off and tell you that you are being a bitch or act as if your feelings are unwarranted? Or even worse, you’re imagining things. If you’re made to feel that you shouldn’t feel a certain way, maybe it’s time to move on. However, if your feelings are genuinely at least recognized and they are somewhat apologetic, there could be hope.
Do They Make Efforts to Change?
Recognizing one’s feelings and knowing there is a problem is one thing, acting on it is a completely different story. If someone is making an effort to work on the relationship, address concerns, and make it a collaborative effort, it’s definitely worth sticking around. However, if they continually do things to intentionally piss you off, or they say they will work on it but fail to exert themselves in any manner, it’s not likely they ever will. Actions certainly speak louder than words.
Have You Looked in the Mirror Lately?
You can sit and complain about your partner all day long, but have you had a really good look at yourself lately? If they are making somewhat of an effort, I am sure there are things you can do to make it a little easier. Not only that, what are their complaints? It’s always easy to pick apart what they can improve. Don’t forget, you’re not immune to imperfection. Don’t be a hypocrite and listen to their complaints as well. You can’t constantly blow smoke up someone’s ass without inhaling a little yourself.
A relationship requires changing and growing together. It’s usually impossible to continue if one or both of you are not willing to admit and work on your weaknesses and your faults. More importantly, be eager and able to help each other develop your strengths. If the time comes when things aren’t moving forward and improving (albeit slowly) and you’re sitting on idle waiting for the next shoe to drop, it may be time to move on and let go…