- What does jerking off or masturbation really mean?
- Is there a certain technique for jerking off?
- My friend says all guys do it. Is that so?
- Is there such a thing as overdoing it?
- My cock is not straight. Is this from jerking off?
- Can my cock get bigger if I jerk off regularly?
- Can I pick up a disease from jerking off?
- What happens if I swallow my own cum?
- They say you can go blind, bald or plain crazy from jerking off. Can you?
- Can too much jerking off have an effect on your concentration?
- What effect does circumcision have on jerking off?
- Will my doctor know I have been jerking off?
- Will my parents/guardian/spouse/other know I've been jerking off?
- Will I still be able to get it on with a partner if I jerk off?
- Can I become obsessed with jerking off?
- Someone told me I only jerk off because I can’t get laid, is that true?
- My priest says if I jerk off I will burn in hell, is that true?
- Is it ok to use a lubricant, and if so what kind?
- My friends say they orgasm when they jerk off but I can’t. What's wrong?
- If I jerk off or get jerked off by my friend of the same sex, will I become gay?
- Is it OK to watch porn while I’m jerking off?
Q: What does jerking off or masturbation really mean?
A: Jerking off, or masturbation is essentially sex for one. It is sexual self-stimulation, usually involving manipulation of the sexual organs by hand. In the US this is commonly known as "jerking off." In the UK the term "wanking" is more common.
Group masturbation is masturbation in a group of two or more people. This is sometimes also known as a "circle jerk."
Sometimes group masturbation involves mutual masturbation and sometimes it doesn't. In organized groups there are often house rules that make clear what is permitted and what is not.
Q: Is there a certain technique for jerking off?
A: There are many great techniques (see our section entitled ‘Masturbation Techniques’) but the most common technique is known as fisting, which is forming a loose fist around the erect penis and then stroking it up and down, usually until ejaculation. Another common method is to rub your erect cock against something, like a mattress, a pillow, or a sex toy, again, until ejaculation. Jerking off for guys tends to be focused on one sexual part, namely the penis, however it is often accompanied by stimulation of other areas as well.
Q: My friend says all guys do it. Is that so?
A: Pretty much. It is generally accepted that approximately 95% of men and about 60% of women masturbate. The figure could now be higher for women, as it is quite some time since a comprehensive survey was made.
Q: Is there such a thing as overdoing it?
A: The answer is yes and no.
Physically, jerking off usually involves friction, the possibility of blisters and friction burns do exist but with the use of lubrication this is unlikely.
On the other hand, you can jerk off too much in the same way that you can over do any physical activity. So, if your hand is cramping, or you are becoming sore, then yes, you are probably masturbating too much.
There is also the possibility of becoming addicted, and there are rare psychological disorders in which people do masturbate almost constantly. If you feel you are over indulging try to abstain for a while and see how you feel.
Q: My cock is not straight. Is this from jerking off?
A: No. Like every other part of the body, each penis is different in some way from another. Sexual activity can induce certain changes in the sexual parts, mostly swelling and color changes. These are entirely normal and temporary changes that accompany sexual arousal. The organs will return to their usual appearance shortly after sexual activity stops. In general masturbation will not affect:
- curves in the cock. Many penises have some greater or lesser degree of curve in them when they are erect, and particularly in younger men, the erect cock tends to point upwards (toward the belly) rather than outward.
- color of the skin of the sexual areas. The color of the skin of the sex organs differs from the color of skin on the rest of the body. In light-skinned people, the sex organs tend to be darker than the rest of the body, while the opposite is often true of dark-skinned people. The skin around this area is different from the skin of the rest of the body. If it was not different, guys would have as much fun playing with any other part of their body as they do playing with their cock! Jerking off does not cause the difference.
- position and size differences of the balls. It is normal for one ball to be slightly larger than the other and for one to hang slightly lower than the other (if not for this latter, males would be constant racking themselves when they walked--i.e. the testes would be banging against one another painfully).
Q: Can my cock get bigger if I jerk off regularly?
A: Yes but only temporarily.
Masturbation neither slows nor accelerates the growth of your cock. Jerking off will neither increase nor decrease the eventual adult size of your cock, and when your cock has achieved its adult size nothing short of surgery can induce a permanent change in its size.
Q: Can I pick up a disease from jerking off?
You cannot get a sexually transmitted disease from playing with yourself. These diseases are sexually TRANSMITTED, which means the germ that causes the disease (HIV in the case of AIDS) has to come from an infected partner. If you have the disease, you have the disease whether you masturbate or not. If you don't have the disease, you cannot get it by playing with yourself.
As for anual sex with a partner, the risk involved in such activities is estimated to be extremely low, but it is NOT zero.
Group masturbation (circle jerks) where you play with yourself and the other parties play with themselves do not involve the risk of transmission of sexually transmitted diseases if you don't come in contact with blood or semen from anyone except yourself and you don't touch anyone else's sexual parts.
Q: What happens if I swallow my own cum?
A: Nothing. You won't get a disease and you won't poison yourself. There is nothing poisonous in semen, it is mostly water, a simple sugar to keep the sperm alive, and protein. The sperm won't do you any harm because they will be killed by acids in your stomach.
Q: They say you can go blind, bald or plain crazy from jerking off. Can you?
These are old myths designed to discourage people from doing it. Men's sexual organs are designed to make sperm and semen, and ejaculate it out of the body. Once the semen and sperm are spent, your body does not know or care what happens to it, and no physiological changes of any kind take place. What masturbation means to the mind, is mostly up to you.
Q: Can too much jerking off have an effect on your concentration?
A: Some doctors argue that it can. They say that you masturbate in order to achieve a particular experience. That experience requires nervous stimulation. It requires the release by your nerves of acetylcholine, which is the same chemical used to stimulate the memory cells. Because the body cannot devote all of its energy to the production of acetylcholine, they claim the lost acetylcholine cannot be replaced, which in turn affects concentration. It’s not proven, but if you find you are losing concentration, try going for a while without masturbating and see if things improve.
Q: What effect does circumcision have on jerking off?
A: Even the most avid supporters of male circumcision acknowledge that removal of your foreskin at least alters the way you jerk off and may make masturbation more difficult. This leads us towards some very contentious topics: Should a parent take the decision to circumcise a boy, rather than leaving him to decide for himself later in life? Is suppression of masturbation a valid motive for having a boy circumcised? Does circumcision really work as an anti-masturbation technique?
Rather than get involved in these arguments ourselves, we suggest a visit to the masturbation page of the Circlist website.
Q: Will my doctor know I have been jerking off?
A: Not if you washed yourself after your last session. If you leave substances such as semen or lubricant on your privates an observant doctor will be able to tell you have been doing something sexual. But even then there is no way he can be sure it was masturbation. If you clean yourself up before the examination, the doctor is not going to have any way of telling that you have been masturbating.
Q: Will my parents/guardian/spouse/other know I've been jerking off?
A: Probably not, although they may guess. There are no telltale signs as far physical appearance is concerned but some people are very sensitive to the smell of semen and semen does leave very distinctive stains on fabrics. If you do get caught, just say ‘hey, sorry, I’m one of the 95% of men who like to jerk off once in a while!’
Q: Will I still be able to get it on with a partner if I jerk off?
A: Of course. In fact, some guys develop better control through jerking off.
Some say it teaches males to become premature ejaculators, however most young males are quick to ejaculate and most have to make a conscious effort to learn to control their urge to ejaculate immediately with or without masturbation. Jerking off and sex with a partner involve different skills.
Q: Can I become obsessed with jerking off?
A: It’s possible, because people can become obsessed with any pleasurable activity.
Males tend to reach the peak of their sexual drives at an early age and the easiest sexual outlet open to them is jerking off. As with most questions relating to sex, many more people will worry about it than will ever have the actual problem. If you feel you have become obsessive about it you can always seek competent advice.
Q: Someone told me I only jerk off because I can’t get laid, is that true?
A: No, it’s rubbish. While it’s true that some people do jerk off because there is no sexual partner in their lives, many people who are married or involved in other sexual relationships still like to do it. Masturbation is, after all, another form of sex, and jerking off, whether single or in a marriage, is still an enjoyable pastime.
Q: My priest says if I jerk off I will burn in hell, is that true?
A: It’s true that certain religions would certainly like you to think so. But then does hell even exist? This is a question of personal religious belief and no one can answer that question for you. If you have feelings of guilt, you may wish to consult a religious authority of your particular faith.
Q: Is it ok to use a lubricant, and if so what kind?
A: It depends on your personal preference. Many men use lubricants because they find the friction of jerking off a dry their dry cock is uncomfortable or less stimulating. Others learn to jerk off before they think of using a lubricant and never have need of them.
Water-based lubricants such as K-Y Jelly are safe for condoms. But sometimes such lubricants are less than satisfactory for masturbation because the lubricant is constantly exposed to the air and can dry out. Oil based lubricants are longer lasting, but tend to be less effective for one on one sex as the lube can cause tiny perforations in condoms.
Q: My friends say they orgasm when they jerk off but I can’t. What's wrong?
A: If you are still be developing sexually be aware that if you are relying on what other guys of your age are telling you, they don't always tell the truth about sexual matters. Exaggeration of their abilities is certainly not unknown. In fact it is very common!
If you have fully-developed sexually, bear in mind that many males identify orgasm and ejaculation as the same thing. But they are not necessarily the same. If you are older and otherwise sexually developed, then the question is: Do you reach a sexual climax but don't ejaculate? Or do you not reach a climax at all?
Drugs can be the cause. Anti-depressants, some antihistamines, and many illicit drugs, for example coke or speed can interfere with sexual climax or with ejaculation or both. If you are taking prescription medication consult your doctor.
If you reach a sexual climax but do not ejaculate, you may have retrograde ejaculation, which is a condition in which the semen is shot into the bladder instead of out the penis. This can indicate several disorders ranging from minor to serious. Consult a physician. This should be looked into whether the particular effect on your sexual function bothers you or not.
Frequent jerking off can produce "dry cum," but this is perfectly normal and is just a sign that you need to let the semen replenish itself.
Q: If I jerk off or get jerked off by my friend of the same sex, will I become gay?
A: No. It will not change your sexuality in any way. Sexual orientation is something that is set at a very young age (less than four years) and there is even some evidence that it is something a person is born with.
Q: Is it OK to watch porn while I’m jerking off?
A: Porn is a natural part of sexual curiosity. Men are highly visual creatures, and porn remains a turn on at just about any age. As you get older you will come to realise there is a politics to porn. There are those that will tell you that porn degrades women and exploits those women that work in the porn industry, but at least in the Western based porn industry, you don’t hear of porn studios holding a gun to these girl’s heads, and the queues to become glamour models get longer every day. If porn turns you on while you jerk off, it’s out there in unlimited quantity, and, like all things, as long as it does not come to dominate your life, a little of what you fancy does you good.