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Terms of enjoyment – an innocent lad lands himself his cream job - Jerking Men Off

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Then there was the time an innocent lad called Charlie replied to a want ad in his local free newspaper under the classifieds section. It read: ‘Wanted: Reliable, hardworking boy to warm the altar boys dinner, Good pay for good results.’

Well, this was a summer job Charlie was born for. He could warm the altar boys dinner for sure. He did it most nights for himself when his mother was out playing the one armed bandits. Two minutes in the oven and the dinner was piping hot. How hard could it be?

He imagined they’d be wanting him at the local parish church so it came to him as a small surprise that the interview was arranged in a bad part of town, but he consoled himself with the thought that probably the good priest would be doing valuable charity work and saying plenty of masses to save souls throughout the week, requiring a mess of hungry altar boys.

Ascending the grimy stairs, he could not help but notice the pictures of winsome looking boys that adorned the walls, and thought to himself, ‘well, the priest is doing the Lord’s work here, and these must be the altar boys.’

“You like to baste the ham then do you son?” Asked the sweaty fat man behind the desk.

“I like a bit of ham sir, yes” answered Charlie.

“No aversion to shaking hands with the boss?”

“Yes sir, I’ll be happy to shake hands with the boss any time” said Charlie.

“Let me see your hands” said the fat man.

Charlie was puzzled by this, but then he remembered he’d need clean hands for handling the food. Seeing Charlie’s powerful hands the fat man grunted: “You’ll do. Can you start now?”

“Well, yes, I guess” said Charlie.

The fat man led him into a large room that was thick with hot steam rising from vents in the walls. The place was stifling. Peering through the mist he saw a number of men in white towels, but he saw no boys in white vestments. There was much whistling and catcalling, and some of the men whipped back their towels to reveal semi-erect cocks.

“I’m first!” said one. And it was about then that the fat man said “Get going then lad.”

“Get going what, Sir?” said Charlie, sweltering in the clammy, steamy heat.

“You know, warming the altar boy’s dinner, basting the ham, shaking hands with the boss…”

Charlie still looked clueless. The fat man scowled; “Your job is jerking men off you idiot, now get on with it, there’s a queue.” “Jerking men off?” said Charlie, horrified.

“Yes, just like the ad said, jerking men off!” roared the fat man, “and by God if you don’t get down to it now you’re going to jerk me off something real bad.”

So Charlie had no choice. He got busy meeting with mother thumb and her four daughters big time, and because the bonuses were so good, he was still going for the gold by summer’s end.


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About the Author

About the Author

Hi, I'm Joseph O'Connor. I am a twenty-six year old man from Texas, USA. I fell into writing about sex toys when I was looking for a way to both try new things and explore my body... Things progressed rapidly. It turns out there aren't many (straight) men that can talk about sex the way I do without getting downright ridiculous. I'm always reading more/learning about the human body and sexual response and always looking for ways to improve my sex life (and that of those I come in contact with).

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